maryooma's thoughts

Prophet Mohammed's marriage to Zaynab

2005-06-30T21:57:00.000-07:00

Some of the Prophet's marriages were for legislative reasons and to abolish certain corrupt traditions. Such was his marriage to Zaynab, divorcee of the freed slave Zayd. Before Islam, the Arabs did not allow divorcees to remarry. Zayd was adopted by the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and called his son as was the custom among the Arabs before Islam. But Islam abrogated this custom and disapproved of its practice. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) was the first man to express this disapproval in a practical way. So he married the divorcee of his "adopted" son to show that adoption does not really make the adopted child a real son of the adopting father and also to show that marriage is lawful for divorcees. Incidentally, this very Zaynab was Muhammad's cousin, and had been offered to him in marriage before she married Zayd. He refused her then, but after she was divorced he accepted her for the two legislative purposes: the lawful marriage of divorcees and the real status of adopted children. The story of this Zaynab has been associated in some minds with ridiculous fabrications regarding the moral integrity of Muhammad. These vicious fabrications are not even worth considering here (see Qur'an, 33: 36, 37, 40).

Hijab - the liberation

2005-06-30T21:28:00.000-07:00

Hijaab - The LiberationHIJAAB

Author Unknown

It is late in the afternoon at the University of British Columbia and I have been cooped up in this library for hours, trying to compose a thesis for my American Literature term paper. Deciding that a break would help clear my thoughts, I leave the confines of the library to sit outside, only to hear a female voice come up from behind me to ask: "Just how is it that you can live with yourself from day to day wearing that THING on your head and letting THEM control your life?" Granted, it is an original line, a creative way to break the ice, yet why the code words? Only because I've been yelled at in public before for reasons connected to my appearance do I know what this woman means.Code word # 1: "head thing"= 30inch X 30inch yellow and maroon flower patterned polyester blend, a piece of cloth I happen to be wearing to cover my head and neck; Code word #2: "them"= all Muslim men who, sinister-like with their dark beards, heavy accents, and hidden Uzi's get a rush out of making women their life-long slaves.Having deciphered all this quickly, I turn to face the stranger-a cross looking thing-I smile politely and signal to the empty chair beside me:"Would you like to have a seat?" HIJAB, the head to ankle covering that leaves only the face, hands and feet visible in public, has made me a very patient Muslim woman. The brave individuals who have mustered the courage to verbally express their opinions about my scarf haven't been the most trying. There are many who can't formulate words coherent enough to communicate > > their disapproval, and so, rely on simple gestures and sign language. Walking through downtown Vancouver, I've been fingered, spat on, scowled and cursed at.Stepping into an elevator, I once traumatized a man who could do nothing but shuffle into the corner of the empty lift and mutter "What the ----? WHAT THE ----?!?!?!?!" I have to take the agitation, the horror, and even the hatred in a stride. But never will I be silent about it.I can ignore the flagrant distortions no more than I can deny the fact that I am a Muslim living in Canada. Who I am and what popular culture thinks I am, has become a tug-of-war-competition of who can explain the status of the Muslim hijab-wearer convincingly. The media tells the public that I am a weak freak of nature who has been forced to subject herself to the tyranny of Muslim fundamentalists. Catherine Meckes assesses that wearing hijab is "some kind of twisted logic" because it entraps women like animals in a cage.The Muslim dress code, she argues, is a form of hiding from society so that I don't have to deal with the realities of my "natural habitat." Ms. Meckes seems to be familiar enough with the Western culture to know that women are constantly objectified, used as commodities, tools to sell beer and boost sales for the next football season. Sadly enough, though, she views women who wish to distance themselves from this commercial degradation with fear.She finds women who cover "disturbing" and wished that she didn't have to confront them on their "home turf."Pardon my feeble-mindedness, I've pinned my scarf on too tight and squeezed reason out of my brain....just WHO is running away from the truth? I have chosen to set myself apart from millions of Canadians, placed myself in the way of ridicule by a society that demands women to conform to certain ideals,I have refused to hide in the crowded university hallways and malls by looking the way Cindy, Cosmo, or Calvin Klein think I should- all because I'm a spineless caged rodent?!?! I have rejected the hip-hugging jeans, the breast-enhancing halter tops, the poofy hair and made-up face, and accepted hijab so that I can be appreciated for my intellect and personality rather than my figure or fashion sense. When I face a classmate or colleague I can be confident that my body is not being scrutinized, my bra-strap or pantyline visible. I have repudiated the perverted values of our society by choosing to assert myself only through my mind. I understand my "natural habitat" very well thank you.I fully comprehend the distorted image of the "ideal woman," but the difference between me and the Catherine Meckes's of the world is that I am NOT afraid to defy those standards. Islam liberated me from THAT prison.Perhaps hijab is so misunderstood because it is prescribed by a religion that makes a bold and shocking statement: Women are precious creatures who have the right to be valued for who they are, and not what they can juggle. When I decided to start wearing hijab, my mother pulled me aside and posed this question: "If you found a diamond that was exquisite in every way, would you show it to all your friends, let them gawk at its dazzle, caress it, or would you covet the stone and protect it by preserving its natural splendor?"Once you bear something for all to see, the second you display something for its beauty, you objectify it and diminish its value. Because its worth is built on its ability to attract, when it no longer elicits awe from onlookers it becomes worthless. Is it a wonder that neck lines keep plunging every year?- more cleavage means women won't bore oglers, the commercial industries, and the rest of society for awhile. But when will those skirts quit shortening?? For how long will women remain sex objects??Islam tells us that every woman is a jewel and when she respects herself enough to preserve her beauty for herself and her loved ones, she rejects being objectified by a society which does NOT value her. Only the dearest people in my life know me without hijab because they love me enough to value ALL of me. John and Jane Doe don't love me or care for me, so why must I meet their notions of an "ideal woman" if they are meaningless to me? It is the desire to please popular culture that makes 15 year old girls want to fit Kate Moss's jeans by sticking their fingers down their throats and wretching(throwing up) three times a day. It is the unattainable Perfect-Body society has conjured, that make "fat", "ugly" girls splatter themselves on sidewalks because they just are "not thin and pretty enough". AND THEY TELL ME ISLAM OPPRESSES WOMEN??I am thankful that I am not suicidal or psychologically unbalanced because I can't meet the demands of my culture. I am fortunate that my concerns and goals in life lie on a higher plane than the dictates of a pretty fashion industry. I am quite content with my religion, for it values my power to achieve great things through my mind, not through my body. Whether I am physically beautiful or not, you have no clue. Perhaps this fact is disturbing for Catherine Meckes and the library stranger because they are not ready to meet a woman who can get by without her looks. Then again, perhaps it is because they are just ignorant of the (WHAT IS IT?) facts. Either way, I don't need anyone's sympathy, I am not really that scary, and your anger does me no harm.I am not under duress, or a male-worshipping female captive from the barbarous Arabian deserts.I'VE BEEN LIBERATED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Links for Islamic sites.

2005-06-30T20:18:00.000-07:00

As i said i would write down the links for u jokers... here they are ;

www.al-sunnah.com Quran & Sunnah.

( sunnah: actions and speech of Prophet Mhammed peace be upon him.)

www.islam-guide.com if ur non muslim then this is the ideal site for you, simple and to the tee.

Enjoy reading.

My daleel for the post below.

2005-06-30T11:58:00.000-07:00

Distortions about the Marriages of the Prophet (PBUH)
Date of Fatwa
1/ May/ 2003
Date of Reply
1/ May/ 2003
Topic Of Fatwa
`Aqeedah (Islamic Creed)
Question of Fatwa
Dear scholars, As-Salamu `alaykum. Did Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) marry more than one wife in order to fulfill his sexual desire? Please clarify this issue for me because I'm really confused. Thanks.
Name of Mufti
A Group of Islamic Researchers
Content of Reply
Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
Dear brother in Islam, we would like to thank you for contacting us and the trust you place in us. May Allah reward you abundantly for your interest in knowing the teachings of Islam! As regards your question on the Prophet's marriages and the real reasons behind them, we'd like to cite for you the elucidation of this issue by the late Dr. Hammudah `Abdul-`Ati in his book Islam in Focus. He states: "As far as the issue of the Prophet’s marriages is concerned (peace and blessings be upon him) it is not problem for a Muslim who understands the ideal character of the Prophet and the circumstances under which his marriages were contracted. Quite often they stand as a stumbling block for non-Muslims to understand the personality of the Prophet, causing one to reach the wrong conclusion, which is not to the credit of Islam or the Prophet. We will not give any conclusions of our own or denounce the conclusions of others. We shall present certain facts and allow the readers to see for themselves. 1. The institution of marriage enjoys a very high status in Islam. It is highly commendable and essential for the sound survival of society. 2. Prophet Muhammad never said that he was immortal or divine. Time and time again, he emphasized that he was a mortal being chosen by Allah to deliver His message to mankind. Although unique and distinguished in his life, he lived like a man and died as a man. Marriage, therefore, was natural for him, and not a heresy or anathema. 3. He lived in an extremely hot climate where the physical desires press hard on men, where people develop physical maturity at an early age, and where easy satisfaction was a common thing among people of all classes. Nevertheless, Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) had never touched a woman until he was 25 years of age when he married for the first time. In the whole of Arabia he was known by his upright character and was called Al-Amin (the trustworthy), a title which signified the highest standard of moral life. 4. His first marriage at this unusually late age was to Khadeejah, who was twice widowed and 15 years his senior. It was her who initiated the contract, and he accepted the proposal in spite of her age and marital status. At the time he could have quite easily found more beautiful women to be much younger wives, if he was inclined towards his physical desires. 5. He lived with Khadijah as her husband until he was over 50 years of age, and by her he had all his children with the exception of Ibrahim. She remained his wife until her death when she was over 65 years, and throughout her marriage the Prophet never took another wife or had any other intimacy. 6. Persecutions and perils were continually inflicted on him and the believers, particularly at the end of Khadijah’s life. It was during this time that his wife died and after her death, he stayed without re-marrying for some time. Sawdah, who had emigrated with her husband to Abyssinia in the early years of persecutions, sought shelter on her way back after her husband died. The natural course for her was to turn to the Prophet himself for whose mission her husband had died. The Prophet extended his shelter and married her. She was not particularly young or beautiful. She was an ordinary widow with a quick temper. Later in the same year, the Prophet proposed to `A'ishah who was seven years old and the daughter of his beloved Companion, Abu Bakr (may Allah be pleased with him). The marriage was not consummated until sometime after the emigration to Madinah and when she had reached maturity. The motives of these two marriages can be understood to be anything except passion and physical attraction. However, he lived with the two wives for five to six years, when he was 56 years of age, without taking any other wife. 7. From the age of 56 to 60, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) contracted nine marriages in quick succession. In the last three years of his life he contracted no marriages at all. Most of his marriages were contracted in a period of about five years when he was passing the most difficult and trying stage in his mission. At that time the Muslims were engaged in decisive battles and entangled in an endless circle of external and internal problems. It was at that time that the Islamic legislation was in the making, and the foundations of an Islamic society were being laid down. The fact that Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) was the most dominant figure in these events and the center around which they revolved, and that most of his marriages took place during this particular period is an extremely interesting phenomenon. It invites the serious attention of historians, sociologists, legislators, psychologists, etc. It cannot be interpreted simply in terms of physical attraction and lust. 8. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) lived a simple and modest life. During the day he was the busiest man of his era as he was Head of State, Chief Justice, Commander-in-Chief, instructor, etc. At night he was spiritually devoted to Allah as he used to stay one to two-thirds of every night vigilant in prayer and meditation (Qur'an, 73: 20). His furniture consisted of mats, jugs, blankets and other simple things, although he was the king and sovereign of Arabia. His life was so severe and austere that his wives once pressed him for worldly comforts, but they never had any (cf. Qur'an, 33: 48). Obviously, that was not the life of a lustful and passionate man. 9. The wives he took were all widows or divorced with the exception of `A'ishah. None of these widowed and divorced wives was particularly known for physical charms or beauties. Some of them were senior to him in age, and practically all of them sought his hand and shelter, or were presented to him as gifts, but he accepted them as legal wives. This is the general background of the Prophet's marriages, and it cannot give any impression that these marriages were in response to physical needs or biological pressures. It is inconceivable to think that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) maintained so large a number of wives because of personal designs or physical wants. Anyone, friend or foe, who doubts the moral integrity or the spiritual excellence of Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) on account of his marriages has to find satisfactory explanations of questions like these. Why did he first marry at the age of 25 after having had no association with any female? Why did he choose a twice-widowed woman, 15 years his senior? Why did he remain with her until her death when he was over fifty without having another wife? Why did he accept all those helpless widows and divorcees who possessed no particular appealing qualities? Why did he lead such an austere and hard life, when he could have had an easy and comfortable one? Why did he contract most of his marriages in the busiest five years in his life when his mission and career were at stake? How could he manage to be what he was, if the harem life or passions overtook him? There are many other points that can be raised and the whole subject cannot be simply interpreted in terms of masculine love and desire for women. It calls for serious and honest consideration. Reviewing the marriages of Prophet Muhammad individually one does not fail to find the actual reasons behind these marriages. They may be classified as follows: 1. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) came to the world as an ideal model for mankind, and he was in all aspects of his life. Marriage in particular is a striking illustration. He was the kindest, most loving and charitable husband. He had to undertake all stages of human experience and moral tests. He lived with one wife and with more than one, with the old and the young, with the widow and the divorcee, with the pleasant and the temperamental, and with the renowned and the humble. But, in all cases be was the epitome of kindness and consolation, and so designated to experience all the different aspects of human behavior and situations. This could not have been a physical pleasure; it was a moral trial as well as a human task, and a hard one too. 2. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) came to establish morality and assure every Muslim of security, protection, moral integrity and a decent life. His mission was put to the test in his life and it did not stay in the stationary form of theory. As usual, he took the hardest part and did his share in the most inconvenient manner. Wars and persecution burdened the Muslims with many widows, orphans and divorcees. They had to be protected and maintained by the surviving Muslim men. It was his practice to help these women become resettled by marriage to his Companions. The Companions rejected some women and so some of those women sought his personal patronage and protection. Realizing fully their conditions and sacrifices for the cause of Islam, he had to do something to relieve them. One course of relief was to take them as his own wives and accept the challenge of heavy liabilities. So he did so and maintained more than one wife at a time when it was no fun or easy course. He had to take part in the rehabilitation of those widows, orphans and divorcees because he could not ask his Companions to do things that he himself was not prepared to do or participate in. These women were trusts of the Muslims and they had to be looked after jointly. What he did, then, was his share of responsibility, and as always his share was the largest and heaviest. That is why he had more than one wife and more than any of his Companions. 3. There were many prisoners of war captured by the Muslims who were entitled to security and protection. They were not killed or denied their rights: human or physical. On the contrary, they were helped to settle down through legal marriages to Muslims instead of being taken as concubines and common mistresses. That also was another moral burden on the Muslims, which had to be shouldered jointly as a common responsibility. Here, again, Muhammad carried his share and took some responsibilities by marrying two of those captives. 4. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) contracted some of his marriages for sociopolitical reasons. His principal concern was the future of Islam. He was interested in strengthening the Muslims by all bonds. That is why he married the young daughter of Abu Bakr, his First Successor, and the daughter of `Umar, his Second Successor. It was by his marriage to Juwayriyyah that he gained the support for Islam of the whole clan of Bani Al-Mustaliq and their allied tribes. It was through marriage to Safiyyah that he neutralized a great section of the hostile Jews of Arabia. By accepting Mariyah, the Copt from Egypt, as his wife, he formed a political alliance with a king of great magnitude. It was also a gesture of friendship with a neighboring king that Muhammad married Zaynab who was presented to him by the Negus of Abyssinia in whose territory the early Muslims found safe refuge. 5. By contracting most of these marriages, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) meant to eliminate the caste or class system, racial and national pride and superiority, and religious prejudices. He married some of the humblest and poorest women. There was his marriage to Mariyah from Egypt, a Jewish woman of a different religion and race, and a Negro girl from Abyssinia. He was not satisfied with merely teaching brotherhood and equality: actions speak louder than words. 6. Some of the Prophet's marriages were for legislative reasons and to abolish certain corrupt traditions. Such was his marriage to Zaynab, divorcee of the freed slave Zayd. Before Islam, the Arabs did not allow divorcees to remarry. Zayd was adopted by the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and called his son as was the custom among the Arabs before Islam. But Islam abrogated this custom and disapproved of its practice. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) was the first man to express this disapproval in a practical way. So he married the divorcee of his "adopted" son to show that adoption does not really make the adopted child a real son of the adopting father and also to show that marriage is lawful for divorcees. Incidentally, this very Zaynab was Muhammad's cousin, and had been offered to him in marriage before she married Zayd. He refused her then, but after she was divorced he accepted her for the two legislative purposes: the lawful marriage of divorcees and the real status of adopted children. The story of this Zaynab has been associated in some minds with ridiculous fabrications regarding the moral integrity of Muhammad. These vicious fabrications are not even worth considering here (see Qur'an, 33: 36, 37, 40). These are the circumstances accompanying the Prophet's marriages. For the Muslims there is no doubt whatsoever that Muhammad had the highest standards of morality and was the perfect model for mankind under all circumstances. To non-Muslims we appeal for a serious discussion of the matter. Then, they may be able to reach sound conclusions."
You can also read:
The Prophet's Multiple Marriages: Why?
Addressing Misconceptions about Prophet’s Marriage to `Aisha
Allah Almighty knows best.